If UNC majors were Harry Potter Houses

Over fall break, ABC Family — I refuse to call it Freeform — had a Harry Potter weekend marathon, so I too of course, had a marathon… in which I watched Daniel Radcliffe and the gang, yet again, go through puberty.

While watching it, I realized how silly it was that students were sorted into one of four houses on #FDOC. Talk about nerve-wracking icebreakers. Each house had a reputation — the brave, the loyal, the brainy and the cunning. They would be defined as that for the rest of their life. Crazy, right?

People will unfortunately make assumptions about you based on your major here at UNC, but they’re all taught and studied at this school for a reason. Just like not all Slytherins are bad, not all communications majors are blonde.

(Remember: Harry named his son Albus Severus for a reason).

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Gryffindor

You might belong in Gryffindor,

Where dwell the brave at heart,

Their daring, nerve, and chivalry

Set Gryffindors apart;

Ah, the brave, the courageous and the sometimes cocky. Gryffindors can sometimes brag about their accomplishments and rightfully so. They are the ones at the family reunion who aren’t afraid to tackle pre-med while juggling five different school organizations who seemingly still have their life together. Gryffindors are game changers.

Majors: Dramatic Art, Biology, Clinical Laboratory Science, Nursing, Pre-Health, Public Health, Speech and Hearing Sciences, African, African American and Diaspora Studies, Communication Studies, Computer Science, Germanic and Slavic Languages and Literatures, PWAD, Exercise and Sport Science, Women’s and Gender Studies

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Hufflepuff

You might belong in Hufflepuff,

Where they are just and loyal,

Those patient Hufflepuffs are true

And unafraid of toil;

I’m a Hufflepuff and I will tell you first-hand that we don’t get enough love. J.K. Rowling said it herself: we should all want to be Hufflepuffs. 

Majors: Music, Dental Hygiene, Environmental Sciences and Studies, Education, Asian Studies, Archaeology, Economics, Geography, Geological Sciences, Information Science, Pharmacy, Sociology, Global Studies

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Ravenclaw

Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,

if you've a ready mind,

Where those of wit and learning,

Will always find their kind;

The Luna’s and Cho’s of the world are here for a good reason. Their independent nature can be mistaken as “quirky,” but they don’t care. Known for their passion for learning and extremely loving personalities, Ravenclaws are bomb. Rumor has it in fact, that Ravenclaw is the new Gryffindor.

Majors: Art History, Studio Art, Psychology, American Studies, Classics, Comparative Literature, English, Anthropology, Chemistry, Latin American studies, Linguistics, Physics and Astronomy, Religious Studies, Applied Science and Engineering, Interdisciplinary Studies, Political Science

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Slytherin

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

Those cunning folks use any means

To achieve their ends.

When the sorting hat said “You could be great in Slytherin,” he wasn’t lying. Slytherins are the most ambitious and hard-working people I know. Driven to succeed, they almost never fail. They are great at coming up with plans and are quick thinkers. Slytherin, you know how to get things done, and I admire that about you (let’s be real, I just sorted every UNC major into fictional houses).

Majors: Radiologic Science, Business, Contemporary European Studies, Romance Studies, History, Management and society, Mathematics, Media and Journalism, Philosophy, Public Policy, Mathematical decision sciences

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If there’s a major that hasn’t been covered, your owl is on its way.

@dottieblyth